Being a Foster "Parent"

[Texas Foster Mommy]

I am a foster parent, and my husband and I are in our early 20's,I am 23 and he is 22. We have been doing it for about a year and a half and have been through 6 children. 3 of which were siblings, ( that I did not have at the same time) and the other three are current. I only keep kids 0-5. I was told yesterday at my local CPS office by a worker (not mine thanks god) that needed to keep a distance and be more professional with my foster kids. I was hugging my 5 year old and I kissed her little head because her bio brother got to have a visit and she did not get one, because there is no one that wants to see her. She is the sweetest thing, It really made me angry when she said that. That is my baby and she got her feelings hurt. I needed to hold her and tell her that it was going to be ok. I understand that case workers need to keep there distance for what ever reason, but I am a parent and I love my kids and I Hug them and let them sit in my lap and watch tv. I am the one that sits on there floor at night when they have had a bad dream. I am the one at the Er in the middle of the night when they are sick. I am the one that holds their nose closed for 45 minuets until the blood stops running, and I hold their hand in the recovery room when they have their tonsils out (which in my 4 year olds case should have been done when he was 2) I am the one that helps them understand that its ok to come out of there shell and be a kid AND helps them form that healthy bond with a parental figure, which she has never had. All my kids call me mom, they all have, its not a requirement, when the shoe fits wear it. I love each and every of my kids and every time one leaves they take a piece of me with them. I fight for my kids, when they are hurting, keep pushing until something is done. When they are having behavior issues, I try to understand why, and we work in therapy until its resolved. So untill she has been in my shoes she has no room to talk. Thanks for letting me vent. She just acted like I was the only Foster parent in the world that nurtures the kids. Am I? Surely not. Anyone have any comments?

[loverofpeace]

Something similar happened to the FP of my FC sibling. She was told she fell too much in love with the child. How can anyone love a child too much? That is the problem with our society today - not enough love. Children are full of hate and anger. If there they were loved - kissed, hugged, reassured, - more, they would be more trusting and open. Do they want FP to abuse and treat FC bad? I thougth it was our job to make them feel safe and to comfort their pains. Keep loving and fighting for the children in the end we all will be blessed.

[Libby in Texas]

Wow, no, never encountered a caseworker not wanting to see love and attention being given to a child... ever. I'm in TX, North DFW area and been a foster mama for a little over 3 years and I hug and love on my babies like they are my very own because for a time, they become like my own. I can't imagine ever being reprimanded for that. I've actually heard just the opposit... more 'thank you' for loving them so much as its NOT what they typically see.